Because everything you know about wooing a seductive Japanese hostess comes from watching Keanu Reeves in 47 Ronin , we've put together this handy guide to getting a geisha -- and, more importantly, how to do so without breaking the bank. Because normally they break the bank. But we've got tricks. Which doesn't necessarily mean what you thought it did Who is she, anyway? Geisha are upscale entertainers who, like magicians, you rent for parties.
However, rather than repeatedly asking, "Is this your card? Unless, of course, your ultimate dream girl performs card tricks. When you ask, she's there; she's delicate, demure, charming, stylized, graceful, and maybe a little bawdy. She sings for you , dances for you , dresses for you , calls attention to you , and makes sure everybody in the room knows you're the top dog.
Unless DMX is there, and has a better geisha. Upping your status is a national obsession in the Land of the Rising Sun, and geisha are the ultimate image doctors. Get one on your arm, and you're everything a man should be. There is, however, a shortcut to scoring a geisha: a little-known tour called Kyoto Sights and Nights.
Most geisha pay the bills by escorting business moguls to events, which can cost thousands of dollars. Why so much? Theirs is a skill that takes years to refine But geisha also perform song and dance routines at traditional teahouses, and this is where Kyoto Sights and Nights steps in.
Or life, for that matter. It's just for an hour or two -- which is one of the reasons it's so affordable-ish -- but compared to zero hours ever that's pretty solid. Or just to nod a lot. Far from stiff, geisha are all about relaxation for you and themselves -- so sit back, have some sake, chat, and ask questions.
